Coming Out for Marriage Equality

So here’s the thing. I avoid talking about politics.
Partly because of where I work, partly because I don’t care how other people vote, partly because I’ve voted differently in every single election for which I’ve been eligible. This is not about politics in general or individual parties or an election.
This is about one bill. This is about standing up.

Today the Marriage (Definition of Marriage) Amendment Bill was drawn from the ballot. It will, eventually, be debated in the House.
To quote from the Bill itself “This Bill will make it clear that a marriage is a union of 2 people regardless of their sex, sexual orientation, or gender identity. It will ensure that all people, regardless of their sex, sexual orientation, or gender identity will have the opportunity to marry if they so choose.”

I support marriage equality. I am married. I am also bisexual*.

For the past 8 years New Zealand has had the Civil Union Act which has allowed same sex couples to legally recognise their unions. That the State will allow them to get ever-so close to marriage equality and still deny it. To say ‘yes, of course you’re equal … almost’. To say ‘we support your right to everything but’.
That was fine. As a first step. After eight years the next step is overdue.

I’m not coming out because I feel like that validates my support of marriage equality. I think my being a rational human being does that. I’m coming out because, maybe, you didn’t know. Because maybe you assumed that a sexuality slightly off normal would be visible in some way. Because I’m happy to stand up and be counted.
My husband and I support marriage equality.

And, damn it, if everything falls apart with Craig, and the next person I fall for is a woman? I would hate that I couldn’t marry her too.

Palazzo Vecchio2

* always have been, probably always will be, it’s not a big deal.



  1. Gem Wilder · July 26, 2012

    BRAVO!!! I want to buy you All Of The Drinks & All Of The Flowers!

    • Sarah-Rose · August 2, 2012

      Thank you! thank you thank you thank you.

  2. nenuphars · July 26, 2012

    I’m glad you hit publish 🙂

    This line “I think my being a rational human being does that” basically summed it up for me.

  3. hungryandfrozen · August 1, 2012

    Meant to reply when you first posted this, then I thought I had but it turns out I’d just thought about it rather than actually doing it so: you are fantastic. In some ways that little asterisk is not a big deal and in some ways it’s a huge deal. Yay you. Yay you both.

    • Sarah-Rose · August 2, 2012

      Thank you. The positive responses I’ve had to this post have made posting it worthwhile.

      • Kowhai · April 25, 2013

        Everything in this this post: precisely so.

  4. Pingback: History was made, 77 to 44 | Oh, Sarah-Rose

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