Every time I tried to think properly about this year that has passed all I got was a ringing in my ears. In so many ways this has been the best and worst year of my life. And I’m getting old, so that’s saying a lot.
I can’t bring myself to look back at resolutions or write about anything let alone everything that happened this year. Because, truly, it felt like Everything happened this year.
I’ve ended 2013 feeling happy, free, honest, thinner, more colourful, more nourished.
Also, probably, less healthy and with a sense of sweet sadness. There must be a German word for that feeling.
There is a German word for my feelings about 2014: vorfreude. A form of anticipation that imagines future pleasures.
I did keep a running tally of Very Good Things that happened in 2013. Here are just a select few:
x Miracle berries
x woodfired pizza
x Shakespeare plays
x seeing a beached shark get rescued
x that time Mermaids played the Pitch Perfect soundtrack on the street
x Kitty Gang tattoos
x Jennifer Lawrence at the Oscars
x my new job!
x ten hours of Made in Chelsea
x buying an apartment
x commissioning a tattoo from Devon Anna Smith
x knitting circle
x Wellington storms – the survival thereof
x coming out to Craig and he was the MOST supportive
x “You’re modern art to me.”
I think I’ll keep this up for 2014.
I really do enjoy winter. I am, at heart, a cold-weather girl.
However, for event crisp clear morning there are days of grey and gloom and grizzle. Those days I cannot abide.
I struggle with winter, is what I’m saying.
As such, I am pleased my calendar is filled up. In order to stave off the mean-reds of SAD I have booked myself to the hilt with things to make me smile.
It all starts this Saturday with a brunch. I find that most good things start with a brunch.
After that I have two different tattoos booked, five film festival films, a 29 hour trip to Auckland for friends and art and more brunch, Wellington on a Plate, a hangi night with family, an engagement party, and a weekend away in Greytown.
All of this in the next … five weeks.
And in between it all, should I get bored and cold and despondent, I have warm knitting to keep me warm and my hands engaged.
Winter’s not looking too terribly bleak right now.
Note: the snow photo is from the crazy winter of 2011
One of the absolute best things to do is to peer, curiously, at the search terms people have used to find this little site.
Here are some of the favourites. Or the most perplexing:
Moustache scented Rose
John Waters Ireland
oh my, was that in the script?
workshop girl with plait
Men ridiculous haircut
pin up shoots herself
Beauty mark on Breast
herpes of the eye
and the ever ubiquitous iterations of:
girls with tattoos turn me on.
But my absolute, and possibly all time, favourite?
It feels like a million but it was only two years and nine months ago that I posted my 2009 birthday wish list. I came across this by accident and I realised something surprising.
I was hoping for:
This beautiful copy of The Bell Jar, Protea charm & Protea ring by Meadowlark, Cupcakes (!), Peonies, the permission for Craig and I to live in the UK for as long as we like, beautiful underwear, a Kodak Duaflex vintage camera, St Paul’s Cathedral back in my life, a traditional peony tattoo, a black retro-style scooter, Chloe Sevigny for Open Ceremony Wedges, Meadowlark pyramid stud bangles, a Marc by Marc Jacobs bag in a berry berry hue.
And two years, nine months later? honest to anything, it would be easier to list the items I do not have.
I do not own that copy of The Bell Jar, I do not have a black retro-style scooter, my Chloe Sevigny for Open Ceremony Wedges are Jeffrey Campbell knock-offs but besides that?
The permission to live in the UK was really just the best.
I was surprised. I am a fortunate fortunate person.
It was nice to remember that.
(It hasn’t been two years nine months of presents, it has been two years, nine months of working hard and saving harder. And a couple of presents)
2011 was a year with a lot of up, a lot of down, and quite a bit of in between.
In 2011 Craig and I said goodbye to the Hutt Valley for city living in Wellington. We travelled to Hawaii and not much of anywhere else. Work was both stressful and fulfilling, full of sound and fury, culminating in … not a lot.
My family expanded by one when my baby sister got married. Full family dinners are now a table of eight.
I am skinnier, richer, happier, and more complicated than ever before. I made new friends, kept old ones, and made the most of living in town.
Best of all, best of all, I became an Irish citizen.
In 2011 I resolved to:
x be more frugal – yes? yes.
x maintain the healthy-ish lifestyle I managed in 2010 – yes.
x declutter – oh yes.
x take a photo every damn day – yes! yet again. I missed two self-portraits though.
x keep percolating this tattoo idea. – yes! and uh … also yes.
I am ever so excited about 2012:
x a new job**
x taking a photo every damn day
x new tattoos***
Let’s see how it goes. I can’t wait!
* in April Craig and I are, leave from work notwithstanding, heading to Europe for a month.
** fingers crossed. I have leads and plans.
*** I have plans for two in 2012. I’ve managed to make it onto the list for one of my wishlist artists. I cannot wait.
One of the things I like most about taking a photo every damn day is looking back at this day in years past.
Some years are more exciting than others …